i think it's bad luck to start the year on a bad note, but i think my harvard dreams are going down the nus-drain. my list of nus gripes continues to grow, and the crux of it lies in my major. i came expecting bio to be enjoyable. i guess it is now, and it was a pain in the ass to get to the third year. i'd like to think i am the victim in a vicious world, but i know i am to blame for some of the shit i'm in now. so many maybe's. if i had worked harder, maybe i wouldn't have failed a class. and yet when i work my ass off and do well for all the CA's, life deals me a bad hand and everyone catches up at the finals, so i end up being average. which is a real bitch.
and i think it's ridiculous i do better for USP classes. someone said being in the USP is a big deal in NUS, evidently not a big enough deal cos i can't make it my major. and then a small voice in my head berates me for being greedy and going off on exchange anyway, thereby sealing my bio fate, preventing me from changing my major. but i know i did right to go to davis, because it was a life-changing experience. i know now, for sure, i don't want to stay in singapore. at least not if i intend to continue my studies.
now that next semester looks to be a tough one, i'm dreading the year ahead. so much damn catching up to do.
everyone wishes everyone else a great year ahead, but only a lucky handful have a truly great year.
